001. it's the way you name your ship | video

[onecertainly]

[ The video feed begins and a young man stares curiously into the camera. He has the distinct look of someone who's just climbed out of their deathbed and hastily tried to make themselves look presentable -- if there is a distinct look for such a thing -- and that would be because that's exactly what he's done.

Still, despite his obvious weariness, his expression is almost cheerful. ]

L-- [ No, not Lieutenant. Not anymore. ] Archie Kennedy. Warden Kennedy, I suppose. [ He raises his hand and it sort of lingers in the air because it strikes him that he has no idea if he should be saluting or not. Do wardens salute? Do convicted mutineers?

Likely not, so he lets it drop back down to his side. ]

This Admiral, he's -- [ There's a pause as he considers his next words carefully. He can't be too forward about his opinions of this mysterious figure, not so soon after the Renown. There's no telling who could be listening. Also, first impressions and all that.] -- well. He must be an interesting fellow to command such a vessel.

Does the entire crew dress as they please? If I must report to someone to receive uniform, I'd be obliged to learn at the very least his name. The one I'm wearing hardly seems appropriate. [ It's difficult to tell by the angle of the camera but he's wearing an old-fashioned naval uniform. It doesn't strike him as the correct attire for a warden. ] Thank you.

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[Video]

[keeps_a_cool_head]

[Sorry, Archie. What talks back to you is something wholly terrifying: a lizard-like man in black leather, speaking politely through sharp yellowed teeth]

Your uniform is appropriate, Warden Kennedy. There is no dress code here, as you can most likely tell. We are...quite informal here.

[onecertainly]

[ First of all, when you make a miraculous return from the dead to serve aboard a really weird ship and the first person you speak to is some kind of demon man, things aren't looking good. Archie's initial reaction can be summed up in one gif.

He briefly considers shutting off the communicator, never touching it again, and trying to undo what he's done.

But that's a bit extreme, and the demon man is polite enough so he forces himself to look at the camera (without seeming too much like he's staring) and clears his throat. ]

Then how are we to tell the wardens from the inmates, sir? Forgive me but it seems impractical.

[ Polite enough words but if one listens well they might detect the very slightest hint of sass in his tone because seriously it makes no sense for everyone to just wear what they want. ]

[keeps_a_cool_head]

[Scorpius is very much aware of how he looks and how he must appear to humans of this time period. But he's come to like Horatio, and this man - this warden Kennedy - seems to be in much the same spirits. The fact that Archie continues to speak rather than immediately recoil is promising. Scorpius approves]

Practice and instinct. There are less than a hundred of us in number here, and the memorization comes easily.

But you'll soon notice there is a distinct mixing of the ranks that may be off-putting. Wardens sit with inmates for meals, at work, and through ports. There are subtle clues, of course, but ultimately all one need do to determine the truth is ask.

You must come from the military.

[shakenandlimp]

Lieutenant Archie Kennedy? Lately of the Renown?

[Bush has mixed feelings on the subject-- he distrusts the bend between worlds that means that Lieutenant Hornblower is not quite the same young man he knew those long years ago, that he may not be destined to be the same admired commander who Bush has served under and faced death with.

But he is not a man with much jealousy in him, and he knows that this young officer is important to Hornblower, which tempers his unease with pleasure.]

I am Captain Bush-- Warden is my rank here-- very lately of His Majesty's ship of the line Nonsuch. I wear my old sea clothes here, most occasions save when we go into port, and I assure you there's nothing in your sea chest more shocking than what Miss Iris Wildthyme wears when it strikes her fancy. You needn't worry, lad. We are a strange crew.

Speaking of strange-- if you knew a William Bush of the Renown, I ain't quite him. It is hard to explain-- but there is a young man exactly like you knew who will be able to tell you better.

[onecertainly]

[ Everything Bush says flies right over Archie's head because he hadn't actually expected to see someone he knows, especially not someone he'd been sharing a cell with not two hours ago.

That is, almost everything. ]

Captain? [ That's...odd. And what's this talk about another William Bush? ] I'm afraid your wit escapes me, Mr. Bush. What are you doing here? I thought -- [ He'd thought this was more of a Purgatory thing, frankly. But apparently it's not, and for that he grins. ] Well, it doesn't matter. I'm glad to see you looking well, sir.

[shakenandlimp]

[What is Bush doing here? Well, when a man and a barge carrying a hundred ton of gunpowder do not like one another much...

There are some threads of gray in Bush's thick, dark hair, a few more lines on his weatherbeaten face, clearer now that he has lost some of his tan in the barge's tamer light-- but that is all that the years between 1802 and 1814 have managed to do to him. That-- and the false leg not visible on the screen. Barely visible at all, since he was gifted with a more advanced prosthetic that could be worn beneath trouser and shoe.]

And I am pleased to meet you.

But it's no joke; I have never met you before in my life. Fortunately, a man of our mutual acquaintance has vouched for you. Young man named Hornblower, I understand you may have met?

[Now there is Bush's wit-- not subtle, broadly facetious, and always betrayed by a twinkle in his blue eyes.]

[routemistress]

Oooooh, welcome aboard, sweetheart! We 'ave a couple of your contemporaries 'ere already. I see the dear Captain's spoken up already.

And aye, we aren't formal 'ere.

[Iris is very un-formal indeed at the moment, since she's wearing a pink leopard-print bikini, complete with matching leopard hat and stack-heeled shoes, and broadcasting from a room with a large steaming tub in it. She looks as pleased as a cat with a canary asleep under its paws.]

No need to report to anyone. The Admiral talks to us now and again, but we never get to see 'im once we're 'ere.

[She eyes his uniform with a mixture of amusement and appreciation.]

...I wouldn't know appropriate if it bit me on the bum, lovey, but the uniform certainly suits you.

[onecertainly]

[ Oh. Okay. That is quite an outfit, lady.

Archie averts his eyes and struggles very hard to contain his amusement.

Don't stare, don't laugh. ]

I, er. [ ahem.] Thank you.

[ Maybe she doesn't realize how the communicators work. That's possible, right? ]

I can see you, as well, ma'am.

[routemistress]

And I can see you too, cutie. Get used to it. Like I said - informal. And I've just got me spa back! It's too warm in 'ere for clothes, with the tub and the sauna.

Most of the people 'ere from your world are from a long way in your future, Archie love. Things change. It were 'ard for Captain Bush and all; I don't think 'e knew where to put 'is face when we first met either.

[Iris is slightly amazed that she got that sentence out more or less straightfaced.]

...mind you, we sorted that out soon enough.

[deshabille]

Interesting's one word for it. He's a tit.

[All sunny smiles, which are considerably sharper than they ought to be really. She gives a lazy salute; just in case he's forgotten how or something, she might as well demonstrate.]

Get some jeans, is my advice, they're a good invention.

[onecertainly]

[ By now he's heard some scary-looking guy insult the Admiral, had a future William Bush tell him about how he's a different Bush than the one Archie knows, and talked to a woman who was barely wearing any clothes.

This pointy-toothed girl calling the Admiral a tit was almost a welcome bit of normalcy. ]

I think that's a requirement for admiralty, actually. I was hoping to avoid stating the obvious.

What are jeans?

[deshabille]

[Well, all right. She's taking to him quicker than she took to Bush already. Insulting ruperts is an excellent start to the day. Her grin widens.]

I think they have to fill it out on forms somewhere. Or sign for it. 'I, the undersigned, blah blah, meet the minimum requirements for tittage and thus am qualified to thing.'

They're pants. Hardy pants, sort of a bluish material, easy to clean. Better than whatever nonsense you're wearing.

Corporal Maladict.

Private

[sssiiiiirrrrr]

[Horatio spends a good five minutes fretting and agonizing before he replies, because it's Archie and he looks well and Horatio would very much like to run wherever he is right now and pinch him to make sure that he's real.

But... that would probably look really weird, and a small, paranoid part of his mind wouldn't want to draw the attention down on Archie from any Inmates who might be watching. So it is, that after his agonizing, the first thing that Horatio does is make the communication between them Private.]

Mister Kennedy--

[He falters, gives a quick, smart salute, then words fail him and his face collapses into a smile of delirious relief.]

Where are you, Archie? Where's your cabin?

Private

[onecertainly]

Mr. Hornblower!

[ Archie immediately broke into a wide grin as he returned the salute. It hadn't been that long ago for him since they'd said their goodbyes but it still felt like ages. Death had a way of doing that, he supposed. ]

I'm in cabin four on level two. Shall I wait here for you?

Private

[sssiiiiirrrrr]

[As soon as he has a location, Horatio is in motion, he has one hand on his cabin door before Archie has even asked if he should wait for him. ]

I'd be grateful if you did, Archie. Rest assured though, any wait'll be a short one.

[and with that, the feed ends, and Archie is left tragically alone for the ten seconds that it takes for Horatio to run two doors down his corridor and knock sharply on his friends cabin door.]

[velocette]

Uniforms have always been a way of forging bonds and forcing unity among people who would identify themselves as individuals otherwise.

This place, for better or worse, emphasizes the Self. I'd be surprised if there was ever any dress code put in place.

What sort of dress do you wear when you're not in uniform?

[onecertainly]

[ "not in uniform" what does that mean

Seriously, though. ]

Shirt, coat, pantaloons -- same dress as any man.

[ right? right. ]

It just seems strange to me that the Admiral wouldn't want some unity among his wardens. I've never known a commanding officer so casual about his crew.

[notsoneedy]

Whoa, wow. Uh, what era are you from?

[She's seen some of the time travel stuff so far, or at least heard of it, but. This is definitely the most outdated person she's encountered thus far.]

[onecertainly]

The year of our Lord 1802, of course. If I may ask, why?

[ He might be being just a touch facetious. Just a touch. ]

[video]

[myironeyes]

[...don't mind the man with metal spikes where his eyes should be, Archie.]

I do tailoring, if you'd like something specific.

[onecertainly]

[ Oh dear. He's minding a lot. ]

You're...a tailor, sir?

[diealone]

You can wear whatever you want. If we've got a dress code, no one's enforcing it.

[onecertainly]

So I've heard. It's certainly different than what I'm used to.

[punched_hitler]

[Welp. Have a guy dressed pretty much like this.]

There's no standard uniform - which you've probably figured out by now. [He grins a little.] But if you want something more comfortable, it can probably be arranged.

[onecertainly]

[ Wow uh that's quite a thing you're wearing there. At least by now Archie's almost prepared for each weird thing that pops up on the screen and he's gawking less. ]

Indeed. I've been informed no less than twelve times now. [ A teeny tiny exaggeration. And although the words themselves might sound irritated, his tone says otherwise. ] Your own, ah, uniform is rather unique, sir, if you don't mind my saying.